Stop Using 'Self-Care' as an Excuse to Be a Trainwreck

Ladies, we need to have a little chat—or rather, I need to lay down some truths while you pretend to listen.

Self-care has gone from a genuine act of self-love to a convenient excuse for being a complete and utter train wreck. And honestly? I’ve had it. If I see one more “self-care” post that’s really just a thinly-veiled cry for attention, I might actually scream (but in a very chic way, of course).

The "Wine Is My Personality" Crowd

Look, I love a good glass of wine—or three. Don't even get me started on tequila.

But when your idea of self-care is chugging an entire bottle of rosé while binge-watching reality TV for the fourth night in a row, we’ve got a problem. That’s not self-care, babe. That’s self-destruction with a Pinterest quote slapped on it.

If your liver could talk, it would probably beg you to drink some water and eat a vegetable.

A spa day does sound nice.

And don’t get me started on the Instagram captions. “Wine o’clock because self-care is important!” No, Karen, you’re just avoiding your responsibilities and calling it empowerment. At least own it.

Sooner or later you WILL get old, and when all those health problems hit... it won't be cute.

Retail Therapy Isn’t a Personality

Oh, you blew half your paycheck on an overpriced handbag because “you deserved it”?

That’s cute.

And by cute, I mean financially irresponsible. Self-care isn’t about maxing out your credit card to fill the void in your soul. If anything, it’s about making smart choices so you’re not crying into your bank app at the end of the month.

Don’t get me wrong, I love a good shopping spree. But there’s a difference between treating yourself and trying to solve all your problems with a pair of Louboutins. Spoiler alert: They won’t fix your life, but they will give you blisters.

Priorities, babe.

Do you really want to reach a point where you will need to make an OnlyFans to pay the bills? We need to be better than that with our money. Spread out your purchases, treat yourself today then wait a bit before the next splurge. Easier said than done, I know.

Stop Weaponizing "Boundaries"

Ah, the buzzword of the decade: boundaries. I know Chadillac sure loves buzzwords!

Let me clarify something for you. Setting boundaries isn’t about ghosting your friends because you "need space" or skipping work because you "just can’t today." Boundaries are about protecting your energy, not avoiding accountability.

If you’re using the concept of boundaries to be a flaky mess, congratulations, you’ve missed the point entirely. You’re not healing; you’re just being selfish and calling it growth. Try again, sweetie.

Self-Care Isn’t Always Fun

Here’s a wild idea: real self-care isn’t always Instagram-worthy. Sometimes it’s ugly. It’s doing the hard stuff—like going to therapy, having uncomfortable conversations, or getting your shit together. It’s not all bubble baths and candles, no matter what your influencer friends tell you.

True self-care means taking responsibility for your life. It means cleaning your damn apartment, paying your bills on time, and maybe—just maybe—learning how to cook something that isn’t ramen. Unsexy? Sure. Necessary? Absolutely.

Nobody wants to film the ugly parts of life because that isn't good content. But it is REAL content that is just as important, just not as pretty.

Final Thoughts

Self-care isn’t about indulging your worst habits and pretending it’s cute. It’s about becoming the best version of yourself—and let’s be real, that takes actual effort. So, the next time you’re tempted to post a selfie with a face mask and call it "healing," ask yourself: Am I actually taking care of myself, or am I just looking for likes?

Get it together, ladies. You’re better than this. And if you’re not, well, at least look fabulous while you’re failing.

I will be right there with you, sipping red wine.